Dust : A Sensory Perception

I remember the first time I walked into the attic- I didn’t want to.

It was for a 7th grade geography or science project and I was working on a sci-fi land ‘s erupting volcano. I distinctly remember asking Mom to buy me some mattel pieces to reflect the apocalypse like scenario I was trying to build– toy cars, robots, maybe even Aquaman ?.

But Mom insisted I check out the attic first! I begged and pleaded for new pieces , but she insisted that I must at the least go up and take a look- who knows what I might find!? She said it like it was good thing- but I already had this sinking feeling –as suddenly every sense of warmth left my body.

I was spooked about going up to the attic.

It was hard walking up the stairs to get there, what with my heart pounding and my mind conjuring images of the things that go bump in the night. Who knows what I might “bump” into.  I felt like I had these heavy anchors strapped to my feet…and my forehead began to moisten by itself as tiny drops of water began to trickle down the right side of my face.
I walked up to the attic door, turned the door knob right while constantly feeling the tiny plastic figurine of Superman  in the left pocket of my pant.– muttering “we have got this right ?! “.

But as soon as I turned the knob – the door “creaked” open (the creaking part was in my mind I think)- and as I took the first step in, “it” hit me right in the nose.

I felt like I was inhaling some moist powdered air that was creeping swifty up my nasal wall – like angry ants on a rampage. And the only response I had was a expelation of subdued cough through my mouth. But the “ants” seemed to have made it to my throat…which by now had started to get warm and ticklish – and not in any nice a way. Then there was this odor – that I could not quite identify what it was…it felt old and lost like years in amnesia and neglect. Like my neighbor’s grandfather – who is always staring out of the window – like he is looking at you- but is not.

I wanted to get this done and over with quickly. I was here to scout for parts for my project, so I ventured in further into the attic, still firmly feeling “Sups” between my thumb and forefinger.

So when was the last time some one walked in here? Magazines, books, maps, paper clippings, empty frames, picture albums, umbrellas and even an old lonely teddy who badly needed a hug…there were so many things here! But all of them were covered with particles or rather a very thin veil of these particles . And as I watched it- the veil, drops began gathering in my eyes and I blinked to allow them to pass. I didn’t like this veil, it was all over the place- like a usurper who had marked its territory and staring at it made me very uncomfortable. Like I was being watched.

What is this thing? What is this strange- weird powdery thing that’s cloaking everything I see ? As I began to ponder , I realized that my head had started to feel like it had tiny bricks hurling inside, like a volcanic kiln and the heat was escaping through my eyes . I began to rub them – the eyes-  only to make them itch and water more. I hated this attic, I hated this confounding veil of particles all around me- cloaked in a kind of omerta that pieced my heart- making it cave in.   This veil was insidious, it was everywhere and it was my kryptonite – weakening me by the minute by its all pervasive presence.

It was hard taking in a breath – I had to force  my self to inhale with out further irritating the “ ants “so my mouth had to step in sucking in air in bits for the nose. My face twitched, it felt heavy and pressured like it was being pressed into a wall.

The physical revolt soon turned to a full blown civil war as I reached to counter attack the itch at the back of my neck with a scratch- first gently and then with a little more vigor and then some more vigor and the more I scratched, the more it itched.

Itches travel fast and they scooted right to my arms – making them crimson as I scratched and as if on cue horrendous sneezing took over like my whole body wanted to exit from my nose!

That’s when I realized they had attacked me! . Those particles- like microscopic gremlins- were hacking away into me as a punishment for walking into “their land”…..like “I” had come to steal treasure from them.

….. “the last thing I remember…I was running for the door. I had to find the passage back to the place I was before…”