Reflective Rant

I've had some good time to reflect - given that for over a month I've been in a cast on my foot - not really moving much ( ok , yes I have , even despite doctors orders- but not as much as I used to).

There are good bits to that - a pause helps you ponder - but sometimes , it can go a bit over board.

So today is a rant on how much I hate people in the "industry" - it's not possible to make friends or better still remain friends... Folks always have egos knocking on their door- and it's such a cold place to be - warring at all times with everyone and any one . The emotional drama and quirks and personality clashes - it's just one big messy affair.

But then I know there are people out there who love it , have so much fun- I guess the IDEA if being in a pseudo intellectual field is so magnetic - it's like Hotel California - except that you can leave , but you won't !

Sometimes it's not easy to make a choice or figure out away to deal with things - or approach things.

I guess , a lot boils down to what you prioritize in life. I failed miserably here- I never gave priorities to the things I could - and now out of my jailed window , I look for every opportunity to catch the sunshine -- or starlight or a rainbow - I can touch it , but I long to be with it and dream about it....

As some one pointed out to me - you might get time again to change your life--- but you will never get a life to change the time ( re incarnation and super world metrics apart of course!) .

We are always walking a path - a path of learning in our life - lessons we didn't quite comprehend or learn in our past life - I'm just beginning to wonder - what is the lesson I'm to learn now ? 

Maybe I know - and maybe I'm still hanging on to the poision as it now taste familiar? 

I know better - I wish I could just do "better"